I guess I should explain the craziness of my blog, as of lately. I know most of you probably already know this but I will clear it up for the rest and be done with it. It all started during the summer.
This past summer I learned so much. I learned all about helicopters and Juneau. I learned about glaciers and tourists. I learned that a bike ride in the rain could be one of the most exhilarating things ever. I learned I am the type of person who trusts people immediately in a world where I should make people earn my trust. I also learned that once someone looses my trust it will most likely never be gained again. Whether that is good or bad, I have no clue but it didn't work out so well this summer. I learned that first impressions really mean nothing and are often times completely wrong. I learned that you have to live for yourself and make yourself happy. If you can't keep yourself smiling, how can you make others smile? I learned that everyone should have a mentor, even those who are elderly. It's great to have someone to look up to or ask advice. I learned that black bears are actually kind of cute and most of the time harmless. I learned that finding a good church is hard. I learned that working 12 hr days is also very hard. I learned that nose diving in a helicopter is very scary but very fun. Of course that depends on the pilot. ha!
There is one situation this summer that is still following me, literally. This situation taught me that it really is hard to see the bigger picture when you are inside the portrait. Like I said before, this is the first and last time I will write about this as I am SO done with it all!
So I became friends with an individual through school. We realized we had a lot in common. Slowly but surely arguments began between be and other friends. A huge mess of drama seemed to linger around all summer, infiltrating the walls of my apartment and the minds of my coworkers. Before I knew it I had been pulled away from everyone except that one individual, denied the right to hang out with other friends or even stay extra hours at work to earn extra money. That person was controlling my life. Of course I didn't realize it at the time.
How does this happen? Why does this happen? Well, to much trust I suppose. An optimistic naive mind. I remember the day this person left for a different country, a semester abroad. I felt freed. I was going to miss my friend of course, but I felt like I could finally have other friends without feeling bad. I reconnected with lost friends and started to see the bigger picture. It wasn't long before I found myself falling into the same trap. This person was trying to control me from half way around the world, and honestly, it was working at first. This person had people they were having "check up" on me. Telling them my ever move.
I remember one evening I was invited out by some pilots to watch one of the pilot's husband preform in his band. It was just some time of bonding outside of work. I didn't tell anyone I was going but ran into a few friends there, one of which reported back to the overseas individual and I had a nasty email in my inbox before I arrived home from the event. "The pilots are just not a good influence on you." This was one of the final straws. Before I new it I was getting drunken facebook message after message. Some hurtful, some pitiful pleas. It was all getting to be too much.
Why would somebody do this to someone they call a friend? Well, turns out I was the focus of their crush. Gag.
That seems rude I guess and a bit insensitive. However, when I turned down the individual they decided to make my life hell. They contacted my family and told lies to them, intentionally trying to put a wedge in my family. The person even told me that they went for my family member that they thought would hit me the hardest. Needless to say I cut the person off completely, blocking them from online networking sites like facebook etc. My family members did as well and we thought that would be it, done, finished.
It wasn't, I was sent emails via yahoo. The same as the facebook ones. Some mean, some pitiful. Mostly just trying to get me back as a friend and refusing to leave me alone, as I had asked so many times. Just when I thought the messages had stopped for good, a few of my friends approached me. One said he was being asked to spy on me. The other read me some pretty disturbing messages she had been written. Some begging for information about any possible romantic interests I might have, and also talking about the dreams this person was having about me. Another Gag. It was obvious that this person no longer had a crush but had replaced it with an obsession.
One of my friends had had enough and sought out a mentors advice. At first I was not happy about this as the situation is kind of embarrassing and seems like it is all over exaggerated (and I assure you I am under exaggerating all this too you). However, she had some very helpful advice. She wanted me to go to the police and at least have something on record about all this. I was not comfortable with this, so it was suggest that I learn self defense and tell people about the situation. This way, if something ever happens in the future, there are others who can attest to what has been happening now for over 6 months. This is why I have been up and down in my blogs, as far as moods go. I have been exhausted with school of course but also with dealing with this ...stuff. As of three days ago, the messages stopped, but they usually do for a few weeks at a time before starting up again. All I can think about is getting home to my family where I don't have to worry about watching my back. I will try not to worry all Christmas vacation and just focus on family, friends, rest and relaxation. Because when I come back to Juneau for the spring semester this person will have returned from their studies abroad and we will be living only apartments away from each other. I am sure this person will not be so brave in person as they have been over the internet.
Lesson learned here? It is incredibly complex. I guess Marilyn Monroe said it best:
"I believe that everything happens for a reason. People change so that you can learn to let go, things go wrong so that you appreciate them when their right, you believe lies so you eventually learn to trust no one but yourself, and sometimes good things fall apart so better things can fall together."
I hope everyone had a wonderful Thanksgiving!
♥ Melissa
This past summer I learned so much. I learned all about helicopters and Juneau. I learned about glaciers and tourists. I learned that a bike ride in the rain could be one of the most exhilarating things ever. I learned I am the type of person who trusts people immediately in a world where I should make people earn my trust. I also learned that once someone looses my trust it will most likely never be gained again. Whether that is good or bad, I have no clue but it didn't work out so well this summer. I learned that first impressions really mean nothing and are often times completely wrong. I learned that you have to live for yourself and make yourself happy. If you can't keep yourself smiling, how can you make others smile? I learned that everyone should have a mentor, even those who are elderly. It's great to have someone to look up to or ask advice. I learned that black bears are actually kind of cute and most of the time harmless. I learned that finding a good church is hard. I learned that working 12 hr days is also very hard. I learned that nose diving in a helicopter is very scary but very fun. Of course that depends on the pilot. ha!
There is one situation this summer that is still following me, literally. This situation taught me that it really is hard to see the bigger picture when you are inside the portrait. Like I said before, this is the first and last time I will write about this as I am SO done with it all!
So I became friends with an individual through school. We realized we had a lot in common. Slowly but surely arguments began between be and other friends. A huge mess of drama seemed to linger around all summer, infiltrating the walls of my apartment and the minds of my coworkers. Before I knew it I had been pulled away from everyone except that one individual, denied the right to hang out with other friends or even stay extra hours at work to earn extra money. That person was controlling my life. Of course I didn't realize it at the time.
How does this happen? Why does this happen? Well, to much trust I suppose. An optimistic naive mind. I remember the day this person left for a different country, a semester abroad. I felt freed. I was going to miss my friend of course, but I felt like I could finally have other friends without feeling bad. I reconnected with lost friends and started to see the bigger picture. It wasn't long before I found myself falling into the same trap. This person was trying to control me from half way around the world, and honestly, it was working at first. This person had people they were having "check up" on me. Telling them my ever move.
I remember one evening I was invited out by some pilots to watch one of the pilot's husband preform in his band. It was just some time of bonding outside of work. I didn't tell anyone I was going but ran into a few friends there, one of which reported back to the overseas individual and I had a nasty email in my inbox before I arrived home from the event. "The pilots are just not a good influence on you." This was one of the final straws. Before I new it I was getting drunken facebook message after message. Some hurtful, some pitiful pleas. It was all getting to be too much.
Why would somebody do this to someone they call a friend? Well, turns out I was the focus of their crush. Gag.
That seems rude I guess and a bit insensitive. However, when I turned down the individual they decided to make my life hell. They contacted my family and told lies to them, intentionally trying to put a wedge in my family. The person even told me that they went for my family member that they thought would hit me the hardest. Needless to say I cut the person off completely, blocking them from online networking sites like facebook etc. My family members did as well and we thought that would be it, done, finished.
It wasn't, I was sent emails via yahoo. The same as the facebook ones. Some mean, some pitiful. Mostly just trying to get me back as a friend and refusing to leave me alone, as I had asked so many times. Just when I thought the messages had stopped for good, a few of my friends approached me. One said he was being asked to spy on me. The other read me some pretty disturbing messages she had been written. Some begging for information about any possible romantic interests I might have, and also talking about the dreams this person was having about me. Another Gag. It was obvious that this person no longer had a crush but had replaced it with an obsession.
One of my friends had had enough and sought out a mentors advice. At first I was not happy about this as the situation is kind of embarrassing and seems like it is all over exaggerated (and I assure you I am under exaggerating all this too you). However, she had some very helpful advice. She wanted me to go to the police and at least have something on record about all this. I was not comfortable with this, so it was suggest that I learn self defense and tell people about the situation. This way, if something ever happens in the future, there are others who can attest to what has been happening now for over 6 months. This is why I have been up and down in my blogs, as far as moods go. I have been exhausted with school of course but also with dealing with this ...stuff. As of three days ago, the messages stopped, but they usually do for a few weeks at a time before starting up again. All I can think about is getting home to my family where I don't have to worry about watching my back. I will try not to worry all Christmas vacation and just focus on family, friends, rest and relaxation. Because when I come back to Juneau for the spring semester this person will have returned from their studies abroad and we will be living only apartments away from each other. I am sure this person will not be so brave in person as they have been over the internet.
Lesson learned here? It is incredibly complex. I guess Marilyn Monroe said it best:
"I believe that everything happens for a reason. People change so that you can learn to let go, things go wrong so that you appreciate them when their right, you believe lies so you eventually learn to trust no one but yourself, and sometimes good things fall apart so better things can fall together."
I hope everyone had a wonderful Thanksgiving!
♥ Melissa
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