A lot has happened over the past few weeks. I was thinking today about how I needed to get on and post an update. My life has been crazy with school and moving and all kinds of stuff that has forced me to push back updating the blog. But now, I have decided to take the time to pause.
My Great Grandma died today. It came unexpected. There have been times over the past few years that we have all prepared for the worst, where her health seemed like it would never get better. Somehow it did. She was a strong woman.So...this caught us all off guard.
Today, she fell at her nursing home and broke her hip. That’s what I was told. They took her to the hospital for surgery and I guess I just underestimated the risks. Now we are grieving…well the family is grieving… back in Missouri and I am here in my new apartment, alone, sad… It seems unreal. Being 4,000 miles away from everything will mess with the mind. I mean, technically I could just tell myself that she is still around and that she will be there for Christmas dinner when I return during winter break.
No…
She is happy now. I know it. This was a woman who was strong. So strong. I think that is why we have such strong women in our family. She was strong in many ways. Just the fact of how long her life was is a testament to how strong she was. She survived two marriages…that’s proof too! Not only that, but she was strong in her faith. If this woman is not in heaven then I’m not sure that anyone else in the world will ever go to heaven. That gives me peace of mind. I know she is happy now because she used to talk about heaven. I know that she is looking down on everyone that she left behind and I know that she is happy…well beyond happy…I know that she is ecstatic. She is not in pain. She can breathe. She can walk without help or a walker. She probably has a dog that she can feed endless amounts of chicken too.
I like to think that she can visit any place in the world now. I always wanted her to see Alaska but her health was never good enough to fly the long flights up here. I think she would have loved it. She would have enjoyed the bright blue glaciers. She would have loved the ocean and the whales. After all, it is "God’s country" up here. I wanted her to see the Virgin Islands too. During winter time, it is gorgeous weather there. There is a great breeze and you can sit by the water for hours. I thought she would have loved the feel of the sand between her toes and the peaceful sound of waves crashing against the shore.
She is free now. I will think of her that way. Free to do whatever she wants. Wherever I go, I can take her with me.
Where do you want to go next Grandma? I think the mountains of California sound really nice.
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