Everyone Knows I'm In Over My Head.

This weekend has flown by so quickly and I don't like it.
tomorrow is Monday....A Monday in which I have to take a Biology test that I missed last week. I never knew about it. How do you NOT know about a test? Well this happens when teacher doesn't communicate with her students. Sigh. Anyways, she is letting me take it tomorrow but it only gave me today, Sunday. to study. Oh Joy. I guess some points are better then none.
Today, along with studying, I also had to do my Biology observations. So, I drove to the shrine and watched nothing for 20 min. (There were screaming kids and no animals like screaming kids). And then it was on to the Mendenhall glacier again. We were ready to leave after seeing nothing again...when ten feet in front of us was a bear. I thought it was a dog at first and it was right behind a teenager. The teen didn't even notice it until the bear had went it's own direction. It was cool but I never was really scared of it. It was more like a roaming dog. Just kinda walking around, taking in everything. It was cool. Of course, after watching it walk a ways away from me, I got in my car quickly and drove down the road hoping to get a closer picture. It was gone in the trees by then. Oh well. It was still nice.
Well, I have to go finish studying.
♥ Melissa

You were standing on the edge of a mountain. I was searching the sky for a sign.

I walked into the library today with a little on my mind. To me, the library door is not only an entrance to mounds of information and loads of studying, but also, it has become an Emergency Exit from the distractions of the rest of the world. I have made it a habit to work in the library every MWF after my Psychology class. It has become a haven of sorts and is now where I post meaningless blogs (like this one). Ha.
So anyways, I am sitting in the library thinking of the endless amounts of work I need to do. My Biology class is sucking the life from me and I have found myself avoiding it all together. Bad Melissa. My PE class keeps getting canceled. My Psychology class is pointless. My literature class is pretty interesting though long and sometimes very boring. My Anthropology class just sucks. I don't know how anyone could like Anthropology. It is for emotionless Droids! Sure it is fun to dig in the dirt and find cool artifacts and study civilizations. It seems to me that the studies these people do on different tribes are like....going to the zoo. How horrible it must feel to have someone sitting and observing you like a Chimp in a cage. Sometimes, even pulling out a video camera so they can run home and share you with their little friends. This all occurred to me while I was out at the shrine yesterday. I was down, near the water with a book. I found this nice rock, the "West Rock" as we call it, and was just getting into reading when I heard a noise behind me. It scared me at first, as I thought there might have been a bear behind me. However, it was a group of people above looking down at me. They were laughing and I couldn't quite make out what was being said. I thought then, that this is what zoo animals must feel like. Here I am going about my life and enjoying myself when someone comes to tap on the cage window. I swear, if they would have started taking pictures...well...that would have been down right rude. Sigh. We should leave the little tribes and such alone.... I hate Anthropology.
ANYWAYS...
I talk about the Shrine a lot. It is a small chapel on almost an island, with a tiny walkway to it. It sets high on rocks and has a great view for whale watching. I personally like to go down by the water and climb on the rocks, or just have a seat and read a bit. It is a place to relax and also a place for meditation. Yesterday I read my Bible. I was looking for that solitude with God. I didn't really feel like I found it though our preacher told us that we may not find it satisfying every time. I also spent some time in the chapel praying and then sat watching for whales for a bit. Unsatisfying. So I will head out there again today. Round two. Either way, the Shrine does help me clear my mind and get focused again. It is also an Emergency Exit from the rest of the world and it is probably my favorite to take.
I should apologize I suppose for the pessimistic side of me today. The weather is rainy and the stresses of school are just growing each day. It is times like these that I feel completely alone. And it is hard to keep my spirit up. Perhaps some rock climbing tonight will help with that...? We will see.
♥ Melissa

Glacier Caves!

I realize I am posting quite a bit this month but if you were seeing the things I am, you would be too!
Today was a day of awesomeness!
Today Robert, Kalah and I hiked the West Glacier Trail. This is a trail that ends at the Mendenhall lake with a great view of.....well nice water. Those of us who are local know that you can "Bush Wack" or make your own trail to the actual glacier. We had to climb and climb and climb some more....in the rain, pouring at times...But we made it and it was an amazing adventure! I took some pictures along the way. Some of us climbing up and down and some INSIDE the glacier. That's right. We went inside the glacier caves!! These can all be seen on facebook, as there are 60 and it would take forever to load them on here.
Well, we are all safe and sound at home after all taking hot showers and eating some hot soup. Now we are planning to nap for an hour or so and then it's off to a movie tonight! Something about crazy stunt skiing! Sounds GREAT!
♥ Melissa

Juneau! Take Me Away!

(Mendenhall Glacier Waterfall)

Such a wonderful day!
I skipped class! I needed too. Kalah and I skipped class and we went everywhere. First a stop at the recreation center for an orientation to rock wall climbing. Then we felt like we needed to climb Juneau! So..we took the car and went to the shrine. A favorite place of mine which I just saw three batches of whales go by yesterday. One even breached. It was amazing! Anyways, we went to the Shrine and not even three minutes there we saw the whales in the distance. It was great again. I found a new "rock." The rock was a place toward the end of the road that I used to go to think. Now it is just haunting and so I needed to find a new one. Thus, the shrine holds my new rock. It has other great rocks too which Kalah and I felt the need to climb all of them. haha. After a bit there we drove to the old rock and I explained the story of the old rock to her, and everything that goes with it. We walked the water until we found an amazing water fall in the woods...with lots of rocks to climb haha. SO We Climbed Those Too! Took some amazing pictures and headed home. At home we made some hot tea, grabbed some grub and hats and headed to the Mendenhall glacier. We had one purpose there...the Waterfall. WOW. It was amazing! We got up close right as the sun was setting. And guess what...on the side of the waterfall are all these rocks! haha So we climbed them too! On the way back I managed to get a great picture of the sunset and a heart island that gave me some hope.
It was a wonderful day of relaxing and now I feel more then ready to focus on school for a bit. It was what I needed.
♥ Melissa

(Rocks by the waterfall! Me at the top!)


(Drinking our tea on a huge rock)

I have never been one to follow...

I have never been one to follow. There are people who will follow the crowd, change there story just to fit in, change how they act, talk, walk, dress, just to feel comfortable in their own skin, which in the end isn't even 'theirs.' I have never been one to do this. I've been made fun of, lost relationships and irritated people beyond belief because of this. I can't pretend to be someone I am not. I can't sit back and pretend to live my life. I would not be in Alaska if I did.
I remember telling my mom that I wanted to go to school in Alaska. I was so nervous about telling my family that I ran the idea through my brother first. He gave me some great advice, probably the only advice he has ever given me but I think it was the opportune moment and perfect words said. He told me to just do what I want and who cares what everyone thinks. In the end I am the one who will be happy or sad because of the decision and I should just live how I want. He was right and I knew right then that I was making a good decision to move to Juneau. Nervous...uh yeah I was so nervous. But I would make the decision over again in a heartbeat.
So I am here in AK and I have friends. I have a good life and am enjoying school as much as I can. haha. If I cared about what people thought of me and my life I would not be doing this blog as most people think it is stupid. I would not be sitting in my living room in PJs at 1pm, no makeup. I would not be living here and I would not be taking risks in life. MY life would be boring and unsatisfying.
So, what is the point of this blog entry? It has no point really. haha. Just to say that I am now living on the edge. I am going to learn to snowboard...like hardcore snowboarding. I am going rock climbing, bear chasing, baby porcupine rescuing. I will be graduating with my Education degree and then going into Aviation school. I will be flying. Most importantly I will be happy....in debt, probably...but I already am :)... Satisfied. I will be satisfied.

(Me and Katie just having fun at the Mendenhall Glacier)

(BEAR!)
(Baby Porcupine!)
And That's All Folks!
♥ Melissa

Rainy Days and Mondays Get Me Down

I went to Social Psychology class not really expecting anything out of the ordinary. I sat beside a few friends and proceed to talk about how nice it must be to win the Nobel Peace Prize by doing nothing. How I wish the elegant papers and speeches I have given could place me on the list to be considered for the prize. How I wish I could have beat out the guy who is building schools for Iraqi women. Actually, I don't think I deserve the Nobel Peace Prize in any way shape or form but I think I deserve it more then Mr Obama. At least I don't lie, and I keep my promises. Anyways...
So we are talking about this subject when our professor walks in with this casually dressed older woman, who looks like she just got done working out. He didn't introduce her, he just sat down in a side chair. She sat in the chair in front of the class, as we all remembered we were supposed to have some type of guest speaker today. Looking around the class I noticed that a lot of the students in the class were not from our class. They had actually just followed the professor and guest speaker in from the previous class. Apparently, this lady must have something good to say.
We all watched as the lady stood up and introduced herself. Her name is Dr. Riki Ott and she almost single handedly took on Exxon during the Exxon Valdez Oil Spill, here in Alaska. From there she proceeded to tell us many stories of how the spill impacted and is still impacting the environment and the residents of Alaska. She also told us that corporations own the US. It may sound like an over exaggeration but this lady had her phone tapped twice and was thrown in jail for nothing. She proved that Exxon paid Doctors to tell the residents cleaning the oil up that they had the flu, not that they had oil in their lungs. Her and her small group of friends took on oil companies, represented by 17 lawyers, in court. Obviously, she had us all intrigued and told us she was giving a lecture for the whole school that evening.
Needless to say, I went. My favorite part was hearing the questions and her answers. There were a lot of people in the audience who were quick to throw out questions that had no right answer. She answered these anyways and made believers out of us all. She is an activist and I hope that some day I will make as big a difference in the world as she already has. I hope that I will know when to stand up and fight for what I believe in, even when everyone around thinks it is a lost cause. She is an inspiration.






Www.Rikiott.com

♥ Melissa

Seasonal Depression

I am looking outside right now. It is so gorgeous. It's raining but then it rains nearly every day in fall. The trees look so bright with the coat of water on them. There is a tree next to the lunch building that is nearly glowing. It is bright yellow and orange in fall colors. Some days I just want to stand and watch it for a bit but then the people passing by might think i was crazy. haha. Everything is changing here. This is a season I have not yet been in AK during and I am not sure how to take it. I love the new colors in the surrounding nature and I love watching the snow line drop down the mountain but at the same time I am in a little bit of a funk. I feel like I am not getting enough rest yet some days I am sleeping 10 hours or more. I find myself in the library, or at The Shrine, just to stay away from the house. I don't like going back to the apt just to sit around and do homework. Yet, at the same time I NEED to be sitting around doing homework. It is taking it's toll on me.
Last night, I was sitting doing an annotated bibliography and waiting for my class to start when I got a phone call from a hysterical Katie. She was screaming in the phone and I thought someone was trying to kill her. Turn out she was watching Orcas breaching and feeding. there were five and a baby and they were showing the baby how to do these things. She told me to meet her at Sandy Beach and hopefully we would catch them there. (they were heading out with the tide and moving very quickly) So, I jumped in my car, not even thinking about my class. I needed to see these animals. I needed something to remind me of why I love Juneau. I needed some hope. I picked up Kalah and we flew down to Sand Beach. We arrived to see Katie jumping up and down and the first thing she said was "You missed them by like 10 seconds!!" That is just my luck.
So, instead of doing the responsible thing and going back to my class, we roamed the old mining trails behind the beach. It was gorgeous but nothing new, as I have seen them before. We stopped at a little cove for some pictures then headed to the Hanger for some dinner. After sitting nearly two hours trying to work out the bills with the waitress and manager, our checks were sorta fixed and we payed and left. Sigh. It has been one of those weeks where I feel like I could just cry at any second. Maybe once Eagle Crest, the ski resort, opens up I will be able to snowboard and will be happy again. We will see.
♥ Melissa

October

Like always, I am in shock of how quickly time has flown by. I cannot believe it is already October. Seems like it was just may last week. But then again I have been a busy little bird and we all know the busier you are the quicker time flies.
This past week has been full of a bit of everything. I am still in the process of getting to know my new roommates. Leanne has already decided Juneau is not the place for her and has dropped her classes and is moving down south. Kind sucks since we were all just getting to know her.
Seems like I have been everywhere this past week. I set up a lab in my livingroom and kitchen, for my biology class. Then I set up the last part of the lab at Katies house. We got the results a week later and everything looks good so far. Hoping for an A+ on that assignment. Speaking of Katie's house, we (the roomies and me) have been over there quite a bit lately. They have Guitar Hero and who doesn't love Guitar Hero! It has been fun and relaxing.
On the topic of relaxing, I took a trip with Kalah and Leanne to the Shrine a few days ago. They had not been there and it is one place that Everyone in Juneau needs to go to at least once before leaving. We watched sea lions and then were scared to death by the sound of a porcupine climbing in the tree right above us. It was a gorgeous day and we had to take advantage of it! We also took a quick trip out to the Mendenhall Glacier ...at night...and I had to keep Kalah from running around looking for bears. I am not a chicken...but it was creepy out there at night!
Another thing we do to get out of the house and away from homework is GO SEE MOVIES! This past week we went and watched The Cove, a documentary about the illegal mass killings of Dolphin that were caught on tape by Ric O'barry...from Flipper the old show. It was crushing to watch but awakening at the same time. It was one of those movies that makes you want to get up and save the world in that very moment. Ah...depressing.
So happy news! The snow line is dropping...I guess that's happy news for some. I think if it is going to continually get colder, it might as well produce something pretty. :) Some are saying we may get snow before Halloween this year. We'll see! I am excited to go snowboarding again this year.
Finally, Day of Caring was this past week. We painted a fence at a daycare/preschool. We painted shelves and book cases and we shampooed carpets. It was great to help out and give back to the community. You could tell how appreciative the owners were. And we had a blast at the same time. Win win situation.
ok ok ok back to homework for me!
♥ Melissa