Wednesday, October 21, 2009

You were standing on the edge of a mountain. I was searching the sky for a sign.

I walked into the library today with a little on my mind. To me, the library door is not only an entrance to mounds of information and loads of studying, but also, it has become an Emergency Exit from the distractions of the rest of the world. I have made it a habit to work in the library every MWF after my Psychology class. It has become a haven of sorts and is now where I post meaningless blogs (like this one). Ha.
So anyways, I am sitting in the library thinking of the endless amounts of work I need to do. My Biology class is sucking the life from me and I have found myself avoiding it all together. Bad Melissa. My PE class keeps getting canceled. My Psychology class is pointless. My literature class is pretty interesting though long and sometimes very boring. My Anthropology class just sucks. I don't know how anyone could like Anthropology. It is for emotionless Droids! Sure it is fun to dig in the dirt and find cool artifacts and study civilizations. It seems to me that the studies these people do on different tribes are like....going to the zoo. How horrible it must feel to have someone sitting and observing you like a Chimp in a cage. Sometimes, even pulling out a video camera so they can run home and share you with their little friends. This all occurred to me while I was out at the shrine yesterday. I was down, near the water with a book. I found this nice rock, the "West Rock" as we call it, and was just getting into reading when I heard a noise behind me. It scared me at first, as I thought there might have been a bear behind me. However, it was a group of people above looking down at me. They were laughing and I couldn't quite make out what was being said. I thought then, that this is what zoo animals must feel like. Here I am going about my life and enjoying myself when someone comes to tap on the cage window. I swear, if they would have started taking pictures...well...that would have been down right rude. Sigh. We should leave the little tribes and such alone.... I hate Anthropology.
ANYWAYS...
I talk about the Shrine a lot. It is a small chapel on almost an island, with a tiny walkway to it. It sets high on rocks and has a great view for whale watching. I personally like to go down by the water and climb on the rocks, or just have a seat and read a bit. It is a place to relax and also a place for meditation. Yesterday I read my Bible. I was looking for that solitude with God. I didn't really feel like I found it though our preacher told us that we may not find it satisfying every time. I also spent some time in the chapel praying and then sat watching for whales for a bit. Unsatisfying. So I will head out there again today. Round two. Either way, the Shrine does help me clear my mind and get focused again. It is also an Emergency Exit from the rest of the world and it is probably my favorite to take.
I should apologize I suppose for the pessimistic side of me today. The weather is rainy and the stresses of school are just growing each day. It is times like these that I feel completely alone. And it is hard to keep my spirit up. Perhaps some rock climbing tonight will help with that...? We will see.
♥ Melissa

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Don't trust those cultural anthropologists. It's the ones that get excited at the sight of limestone and what dead things it has been preserving that make life fun.

Perhaps there are moments in our lives, for whatever reason, that we are left on a ledge, unsatisfied and feeling alone only as a reminder that we need a little faith in ourselves as well to live life to its full potential. For whatever it may be, I hope you find the comfort today, without the spectators. After all, zoos are blasphemous and only conceal life instead of letting it roam free!